So interesting, isn’t it? We are all aware and know that mistakes happen. We are human, we are designed to learn through trial and error. Recently, I accepted a job at a local middle school helping students with reading and comprehension. I wasn’t 100% what I had signed myself up for, but it was clear that these kids needed some help.
I take the position seriously. I was surprised to find out how behind some students are, and how hard school must be for them each day. I am in the classroom with 5th graders that are so discouraged, they’re already beginning to speak of dropping out. When I was in 5th grade, I don’t think I even knew that was an option. It broke my heart to hear them talking about giving up on themselves, and their futures so easily. I quickly realized how important my role is. I am not their teacher, but I can teach them some of the best lessons I’ve learned in life. I can teach them confidence. I can teach them new approaches to problems. I can teach them how to reframe their feelings, and situations to see things in a better light.
I realized how critical it is that they can shift gears to better navigate life when it gets questionable, messy or confusing. I can do my best to teach them to believe in themselves and their potential. Middle school is tough, and being a kid is tough. I get it. What I have a hard time thinking about is the way I also hear them speaking to one another. Cruel. Unkind. Unsympathetic. Cold. Selfish. Unacceptable. It’s what they think is “cool”. They think it’s fun to tear each other apart, rather than encourage and help one another. It’s so bizarre to hear them calling themselves and each other “idiots”, “stupid”, “loser” and my personal favorite “gay” (considering I am married to a woman).
I have my work cut out for me on the daily. I take the days in stride, knowing I can make a difference. I listen to them, observe and take action to spread some positivity and optimism. I don’t know what any of these kids are going home to. I can pretend like each one is going home to loving parents, nice sibling- but the reality is I don’t know. I doubt they all have solid support systems. They may be going home to alcoholic parents, abuse, neglect, bullying on the bus or from the neighbors. I generally don’t know what they’re walking into, or the kind of parents/guardians they’re being exposed to. I can assume the kids are using language and behavior acceptable or “normal” at home. I can’t pretend it’s all sunshine and rainbows. I know better- I know what some kids come from.
My goal, considering we have 15 days of school left- teach them some skills to build confidence and teach /demonstrate empathy. I may not be able to work miracles overnight for some students- but if I can make a positive impact on just one, my job is done. If I can be a living example that your household doesn’t have to define you, or your parents, or mistakes- that is a job well done.
I encourage everyone to be more mindful of the examples we are setting for the kids, because from what I see and experience daily- there is work to be done. Let’s teach them to love life, learning and helping where they can. Let’s remind them mistakes happen, people come and go, and ultimately it’s ok to stand out. Let’s show them each day what it looks like to live your truth, and give your best.
We all deserve better, especially for the future. We cannot afford to fail them. Peace and love,
Samantha J.
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